I am so excited to have the lovely Neha from The Womanedge guest posting on the blog today. Make sure you head over and check her out once you have given this post a read.
No matter what may be the reason, whether or you are out of a recent relationship or haven’t had sex for the longest time, or you just prefer no-attachment relationships in life, casual sex can add a whole tablespoon of spice in your life. However, for a newbie or the inexperienced ones, casual sex can be a little intimidating and you need to get yourself accustomed to the rules of casual sex in the dating world.
Sex can come in a lot of flavors and sizes and you have the right to savor it! However, you do have to be careful as this casual sex party can turn your life upside down. So be sure to abide by the rules of casual sex very well!
Well, the list of rules of casual sex could be very long. You may just get confused about how to exactly navigate through them. You do not want to fall in one-sided love or raise your expectations from the other person. Well because, casual sex is supposed to be a no-attachment, usually a one-time thing.
Hi, my name is Neha Chugh, founder of The Womanedge, and I am glad to be writing here. I have compiled this list of rules of casual sex that you should follow! Let me know how you like them in the comments.
Some rules for casual sex are:
1. CHOOSE THE PARTNER WISELY
A no-strings-attached relationship starts way before you actually have sex. Deciding to have sex with a person begins the first time you meet that person. Whether it be in the bar or a bookstore. The primary rules of casual sex include having to choose the perfect person for it. A person who wants exactly the same things as you.
You do not want a person who is stuck up on their ex or doesn’t know how casual sex works. Wanting to have sex with a close friend can cause some major problems, so you’d avoid going on that road. Also, skip hooking up with people you are likely to see regularly, like your work colleagues.
If you can’t really find someone in the real world, a perfect target; try going on an online dating app for it. Just make sure not to get trapped with a fake identity or maybe a psycho!
2. ESTABLISH BASIC GROUND RULES
Now that you have found a partner willing to want the same things as you, it is important to set the terms. Whether you want to have sex for one time, or you want to keep this as an ongoing hookup, or convert it into a friends with benefits thing, you have to set the ground rules initially. I mean this is one of the most important rules of casual sex.
You have to make sure the rules are set mutually and only when you are sober. The rules go beyond the meeting arrangements and need to extend towards the protection you will use. Or the kind of activities you will engage in. You have to decide whether this whole thing is going to remain secret or not. And also what happens if either of catch feelings or don’t want to be a part of this anymore.
3. MAKE SURE TO PLAY IT SAFE
No matter how hot and heavy the moment is, and no matter how much you are dying to have sex, it is always better to ask 2 questions before you actually begin your journey of lusts and orgasms.
- Do you have protection?
- Have you gotten or yourself tested?
If you are a girl, and not on any birth control, do ask the guy if he has condoms or not. You do not want to risk pregnancy with a stranger. Of course you can always opt for the emergency pill later. You or the other person might be seeing other people and sleeping with them too. It is totally your right to ask the person when the last time they got tested for an STD was, You can also say no if you feel they may be lying or haven’t gotten tested ever.
4. KNOW WHEN TO END IT
The best of casual sex has to come to an end, the spark has to fade and you have to say goodbye to each other. Hookups are supposed to be transient and so you should know when to end it before things turn sour and the blame game of feeling start. And if you are the one who began this relationship initially, it is you who is supposed to end it, that too with dignity and grace.
5. LEAVE YOUR EMOTIONS BEHIND
Casual relationships can only work if emotions are locked behind a door, from both sides. One of the very important rules of casual sex is to keep the emotions aside. Both, as adults, know why you are in this together, and that a causal hookup is no foundation of a serious relationship. The chances of this becoming into something serious are extremely rare, so you should not risk your feelings.
When you begin to spend time with a person, it is natural to start liking them, but you should know this isn’t some deep-running emotion, but only because that person is intimate with you, physically.
However, in case you do start liking the person, the ideal rules of casual dating will say to be honest about feelings and end the relationship if it isn’t working the way you want it anymore.
We asked you to set boundaries earlier and avoid meeting them outside of sex, to avoid developing a personal bond. Small talk is okay, getting expressive about your deepest fears and life’s special moments isn’t.
I hope these rules for casual sex help you to ace your hookup game and make it easier to get intimate with people!