Newly Single . . . and about to hit 40

Image of a Broken Heart

Sitting down to write this post, I realise I am feeling slightly strange about putting this out there. I feel a whole lot of mixed feelings and emotions right now, and Im not sure If I will publish this post right now or not.┬áThis year has been the absolute worst for me. Im not writing this post to get sympathy from people and I really don’t want people pitying me, or thinking what a sad stupid cow – so if I do press publish on this post, please don’t judge me?

Im currently in a place in my life where I feel completely lost. In 66 days, I will be 40 years old. I thought by this point in my life I would be settled in my life, possibly married and feeling content and happy with my life – yeah right! On 2nd August this year, all of my dreams and future plans got ripped apart when my ex and I split up – I am not going to go into details, as I don’t feel strong enough yet, but lets just say, it was very messy and I come out of it the more wounded one. Just like that, my while life got ripped out from under me – I am having to sell my beloved home and find somewhere else to live, and also get used to being single again, after being with him for almost 5 years.

Have you ever felt like you are just so lost in life? You just don’t know what to do to make things better for yourself? I know that I want to spend some time now on my own and find myself again, find the things I used to enjoy doing, and start having fun again. I know that age and societies expectations of where we should be in life shouldn’t affect me, but I am aware that hitting 40, people make the automatic assumption that you are settled in a happy relationship and loving life, and for me that is just the opposite.

I am not going to sit and wallow in self-pity forever, and I will get myself back up and get the fight back in me again, but right now I could really do with a huge cuddle and someone telling me its all going to be ok.

 

 

2 Comments

  1. 12/01/2018 / 4:38 am

    Pain is a necessity of life. Without pain we will not know the differences. Change is something one cannot change. Make good use of change. Im sure Mr Perfect is yet to come in your life. One day he will.

    • BeautyAddict
      Author
      12/02/2018 / 3:19 pm

      Thank you for your very kind comment x

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